All Things New Years Resolutions
Started 2018 with good coffee, good vibes, and good dreams, To be honest, 2017 was a mix. Life in a blender...the peaks were jumbled with the lowest lows.
So I hid. I poured myself into work, into staying busy all! the! time! If I kept moving (blending), I’d feel less of many things.
But this year, starting now, I don’t want less. I want to feel more. Joy...Fun...Success...Peace...Connection...Gratitude. Last night I realized that if I want to experience MORE, I must surrender. I need to let go of control. That I must feel every high and low, and accept them as equally important parts of my journey. My 2018 word of the year is: SURRENDER. I need to put my hands in the air and wave a white flag. I need to let go, and let God open my heart to endless opportunities of growth. I’m ready to accept what comes my way. Keep dreaming big... And feel it all.
Today here we are, one week into this new year and it feels like a sprint. This first week flew by, and although having many things on my mind as far as what I would like to see unfold this year, I figured why not begin to narrow them down and really focus on a select few.
Here's my list:
- This year one of my biggest goals is to get my body healthy. Check out a photo of 2016 me, fit right?! Yea that's not the case anymore. Ever since Adam and I have started our business and my family suffered the loss of my mother figure, working out just hasn't been a priority these days. It's not that I've become lazy or that I don't have the self will to do it, it's just that Adam and I both decided that if we were going to start this business of ours -Leoni LLC- then we had to make a conscious decision to sacrifice certain aspects of our old selves in the beginning stages of growing our business. I'm sure the same is true for many folks who start a new life, family or job. The grind is exhausting in it's self and it leaves us little time left over which we use to tend to our home and family. So why is my resolution to start getting myself healthy again? Well because a year ago Adam and I made a promise to each other that we would focus strictly on growing our business for the first year, that after that, we would get back into working out again. Adam and I both worked out religiously for most of our adult lives. It was like brushing our teeth we just did it. With this, we both knew that taking off a year was going to change our bodies. Somehow, genetics I suppose, I haven't gained much weight; in fact I've lost weight because I've lost muscle. ( not good ) But we both knew that we loved to work out, and that this decision to stop for a bit would not last forever because we're just wired to do it. Now fast-forward a year later and here are my thoughts about the subject today: I'm changed, I used to lift weights, I used to obsess over having a six pack and living up to this image I had for myself. Looking back at it now, I was pretty shallow. I don't expect to get my old body back because I simply was a different Astrid back then, what I want for myself is just to feel healthy again. I want to carry a diet that serves my body's needs, more meditation and yoga, to work out on a regular basis ( not everyday like before, but just enough to feel strong, firm and balanced ). Adam and I plan on having a baby soon, and so I would like to prepare my body for the changes it will endure from the pregnancy and also develop a fitness routine that I can sustain during that time to keep a healthy body and baby. Now this isn't to bash on anyone who loves to lift or who loves fitness, what I'm saying is that for ME, my definition of health has changed because my definition of the life I want to live has changed.
- That leads me to my next topic...A baby! Adam and I have our ten year old boy Aryyan and are starting to feel the sadness that comes when you watch your boy out grow you. As in, he doesn't necessary want me to walk him to the gate at school anymore and give him huge kisses in front of his pals. I went through a phase of sadness because of this, but that was short-lived since I knew that my Aryyan was growing into such an amazing young man; and that I should embrace every chapter of motherhood. However, baby fever is setting in strong, it's time for our family to grow and there's no right time; so the time is now. Stay tuned for baby news sometime this year *wink-wink
- Take my vitamins, now this one you might think is silly but I can't seem to stay on track with taking my vitamins every day!
- Start renovating my family home, there's been a lot of talk about us renovating the home we currently live in which happens to be the home I grew up in. I lost my mother figure to cancer almost two years ago and she left me the home I grew up in. We simply haven't gotten around to remodeling it. Adam and I have done some renos to the home, this includes our master bedroom and bath but we just haven't really tackled much more. The reason is time, we've been so busy building the business that any free time we have we try and spend with Aryyan. This year though, it's finally time to start making this home feel more like our home. Now our plans for this place have changed quite a bit, time and time again. But ultimately we've decided to keep the home forever (if all goes according to plan), we don't plan on living here for more than 3-4 years but we do plan on perhaps using it after that as an income property. So stayed tuned for some DIY projects, some reno videos and tips coming soon!
- Lastly I want to FEEL more, as I mentioned, these past two years were filled with transformation and detoxing from people who no longer felt right in our lives, of things that no longer mattered, of expectations that no longer served me and my boys, the ending of Adam's baseball career, losing a mother and starting a new business...with that came a lot of highs and lows. I had a lot of decisions to make and work to get done which in turn caused me to hide behind working and keeping busy at all cost. As a double edge sword, work has been a growing experience but also a hindering one. This year I want to make sure I find that balance between working and feeling more of everything, fully.